What if …

IMG_20160216_183613I understand that there are situations in life which seem to have no solution. The only thing one can do is leave. Forever. You’ve been here, you’ve done your job, you’ve left a footprint and now it’s time to go – even if the place you’re headed to is not necessarily a better one. Yes, you might well be leaving a relatively good place just because you fail to appreciate it or because you simply have no choice.

I’m the one watching those who are about to leave. And I ask myself if I did my best to encourage them to stay; I want to know if there was a little something I could do to prevent them from leaving. I believe I did try but was it enough?

But …. is it even wise to try to hold people when they want to go? Isn’t it wiser to let them go without questioning their motives? Leaving might be hard for them so why make it ever harder?

The trouble is that if I had convinced them to stay, I would be patted on the shoulder now and I would get a few imaginary bonus points, even if I had skillfully manipulated somebody into doing something they would regret for the rest of their life. I bet it wouldn’t be easy to bear such a burden.

And finally, how can I possibly dare to make somebody stay if I don’t know whether it’s good for them to do so? I can obviously tell them a million times that the current place is a the best one, but is it really? How do I know? What if my motives are purely selfish – what if I just want to get those bonus points and a few pats on the shoulder. What if my motivation is to be the greatest homeroom teacher whose students will not opt for a different school when the time comes.

For god’s sake! It’s their lives and their future, not mine.

 

 

 

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About Hana Tichá

I'm an EFL teacher based in the Czech Republic. I've been teaching English to learners of all ages for more than 20 years. I love metaphors and inspiring discussions concerning teaching, learning and linguistics.
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4 Responses to What if …

  1. Marc says:

    All too true. I hope you don’t feel too ground down by external circumstances and those above.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Zhenya says:

    Reading this post I feel the sadness, Hana. You asked: ‘is it even wise to try to hold people when they want to go? Isn’t it wiser to let them go without questioning their motives?’ – I am wondering if asking the ‘Why’ question might make the feeling less painful (for the leaving one, and for the staying one), if it may provide a learning for the future (for holding others?)… On the other hand, the reasons are so unique, the age of students means a lot of changes. After all, you’ve left a footprint – and that might actually mean much more than you/we can imagine. Letting go without questions is hard for me too. Take care of yourself!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Hana Tichá says:

      Thanks, Zhenya. Yes, I am sad. I think it’s easy to ask the ‘why’ questions if you don’t feel personally involved. Once there are occasional flashes of guilt (no matter how justified they are), then it’s hard. But I like the saying *everything bad is good for something*. Only time will show. Many a time in the past I looked over my shoulder to see a bygone ‘disaster’ in a completely new light….

      Liked by 2 people

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